"All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another." ~Anatole France

It happened later this time, but it happened nonetheless.  This is the second time, and I honestly did not expect it.

The first time was June 2013, and I wasn't expecting it, then, either.  Sarah and Ryan got married, and I was so happy and excited for them!  I wrote then about how I didn't cry at their wedding, because I saw no reason to - Sarah was happy, and was marrying a good man.  Someone who would be a spiritual leader for their family, and would help her go to heaven.  I felt nothing but joy!

Until... "it" happened... I walked into her empty room the following week, and I was hit with that sudden realization that everything had changed - Sarah had a new name, and a new home.  THIS wasn't "home" to her anymore.  She wouldn't be coming here for extended periods of time, and her formerly messy room now bore no characteristic Sarah-isms.  She and her stuff were gone.  For good.

As Becca's wedding approached, several friends asked me if I was sad.  Once again, I saw no reason for melancholy.  Becca was happy, and she was marrying a good man.  I knew that he loves her, and that he would "nourish and cherish" her.  What more could a mother want?  And after all, it wasn't like Becca had been living at home full-time.  She had been on her own for quite some time, living and working in Dallas for a year after her graduation from Texas A&M.  Yes, she returned home for a short period of time while she regrouped, but then she moved to Nacogdoches - once again, she was on her own.  So with all of that in mind, I honestly did not expect the melancholy I felt following Sarah's wedding.  But I was wrong.

It didn't come immediately.  The newlyweds left their wedding venue following the reception for a week in San Diego.  As they returned last weekend, they flew into Dallas, and then drove here to spend the night.  The next morning we lingered long at the breakfast table as they told us about their San Diego adventure.  Then, they loaded up their vehicles with what was left of Becca's stuff, along with wedding gifts and (of course) Brinkley, and they made the hour-long trek to Nacogdoches to settle into their new life as husband and wife.  I smiled and felt nothing but joy for them as they left our home headed for "real life."

But then yesterday the mail came, and in the usual pile of bills and flyers was an envelope addressed to "Rebecca Stewart."  And, as I've done so many times over the past years, I walked into Becca's room and laid it on her dresser.  That's when it hit me.  The Rebecca Stewart that piece of mail was addressed to is now Rebecca O'Rear.  And she doesn't live here anymore.  She will never live here again.  The stuff that cluttered her dresser and littered her floor over the past several weeks is gone.  And now two wedding dresses hang in the closet - reminders of the two girls who grew up here; who laughed and cried here, and who giggled with their friends during late-night sleepovers; who got annoyed with each other sometimes, but more often with their brother; who got frustrated over math homework at this kitchen table as their father patiently worked through problems with them; who learned to cook and help in that same kitchen; and the countless other memories that these walls hold.  Now, Becca's room has become like Sarah's room.  And like Sarah, Becca has a new name and a new life.  One that has forever changed her relationship with her parents.  It's supposed to be that way, and it's a GOOD thing... It is God's plan, and God's ways are always best!  But it's still a little sad in a weird sort of way for at least a few moments from a mother's perspective.

But the story doesn't end there.  Thankfully, my first time taught me that.  Because they DO come back.  And they bring their husbands and their puppies.  There's more joy in that, because there are more people to love and laugh with.  And who can complain about more puppies?  Not only do they come back HERE, but they also gain a new family full of more people in other places who love them... And seriously - can you ever have too many people who love your kids?  Not possible!  And then... THEN with the passing of time, they bring BABIES.  And without the change of names, and the new homes, and all of that, there would be no new babies.  And I can tell you, there's NOTHING that compares to your babies having babies!

So yesterday it happened again.  I was sad for a moment, and felt that empty melancholy of an empty bedroom.  But that feeling was soon followed by overwhelming gratitude.  I truly have the BEST . . . the best husband, the best children, and the best sons-in-law a mom could ever hope to have.  Not to mention the absolutely sweetest, most darling granddaughter ever born!  My cup quite literally overflows.

So I will focus on those blessings and look forward to the times when they are all "home" again - filling our house with their laughter, bickering, messiness, and appetites which increase our grocery bill substantially.  And I will enjoy the in-between times when it is just Jeff and me - those days are quite sweet as well.  The FaceTime calls, phone calls, and text messages come on a regular basis, and keep us connected during those in-between visits. The sadness is gone.  Life is sweet.  I am blessed.