It first occurred on November 15, 1986 - a cold, cloudy Saturday spent touring the Oil Museum in Kilgore and watching the Texas A&M football game on TV. That same evening we enjoyed dinner at Johnny Cace's in Longview. It was there that it happened. As we exited the car and strolled across the parking lot to the entrance, Jeff took my hand in his for the first time.
I remember the butterflies associated with that event and the beginning of a lifelong relationship. As we grew to know one another during our dating days, Jeff would often situate my hand in his in the car as he shifted the gears of his 1980 Honda Accord. He held my hand as we would sit together discussing life, our beliefs, and the future. And just like that first time, he would often catch my hand in his while walking together.
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| January 2, 1988 |
Then kids came along...
During the hectic years of feeding, diapering, and keeping our three tiny humans alive, Jeff and I rarely had an opportunity to hold each other's hands. Our hands were busy, clutching little hands and bodies. But those little ones grew up, and soon we returned to our old, familiar patterns. In fact, we slipped back into that groove quite nicely.
Jeff has held my hand through most of life's twists and turns over the past 35 years. His hand has enveloped mine every night as we pillow our heads and pray together, as well as those times we bow our heads in public worship to pray, and as we pray together before our meals. He grasped my hand two different times when it was was attached to an IV as our children entered this world. And he also clutched my hand tightly the day we sat in a doctor's office and heard the words, "I'm so sorry but we cannot find a heartbeat on the ultrasound."
Jeff took my hand in his quietly beneath the table as we sat in a funeral home conference room in October of 2003, still in shock that we were there, making funeral arrangements for my dad. He also grabbed my hand as we sat at his father's funeral nine years later.
What began as an uncertain, silent move by a young man to express his interest in a young lady grew into a comforting habit. According to medical studies, hand holding provides many benefits, including decreased stress, relief of pain, boosts in oxytocin, reduction in anxiety, and a lowering of blood pressure and heart rate. I wasn't surprised to read all of that, because when Jeff takes my hand, things are always better.
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| “Nothing, I learned, brings you into the present quite like holding hands. The past seemed irrelevant; the future, unnecessary.”~ |
At Caleb and Julie's wedding this past October, the photographer snapped a picture of our hands during the ceremony. When I saw it in the album, I was surprised for a moment. I didn't remember holding his hand, but there we were - a special moment in time captured as we watched our youngest, our only son, beginning his love journey with the one whose hand he will hold throughout life.
Today is our 35th wedding anniversary. It has been my distinct honor and privilege to hold Jeff Stewart's hand in good times and bad during those years, and an even greater blessing to have my hand held by his. Our hands are older now, and they show the scars and wrinkles of life and time. Throughout my life I've clasped the hands of friends, my children, and others, but no other pair of hands provides the familiarity and comfort that comes when Jeff takes my hand.
Happy Anniversary, my love. I pray God will give us many more years walking through this wonderfully blessed life He has given us hand in hand.
