"If a man does not make new acquaintance as he advances through life, he will soon find himself left alone. A man, Sir, should keep his friendships in constant repair." ~Samuel Johnson

I've been reading a book called The Art of Neighboring.  I'm about 3/4 of the way through, and although interesting, it is really nothing earth shattering, or revolutionary.  The focus of the book is to encourage the reader to connect on a personal level with people, beginning with those who live in our neighborhoods.  It offers suggestions such as baking cookies to take to new neighbors, or offering to help a neighbor you see who might be struggling with an outdoor project.  Common sense things, it would seem.

It is sad to me that the need for such a book exists.  When I was growing up, we knew our neighbors.  We knew about their lives, where they worked, and where they went to church.  I took piano lessons from the lady 3 doors down, and I played with kids from all over the neighborhood.  Of the sixteen or so houses on our street, I knew the names of everyone who lived in those homes.  I also frequently went inside of at least twelve of those houses - usually to play with their children, or to babysit.  I knew the stories of these families, and they knew ours.  These days, people in most neighborhoods generally don't know one another.  We drive out of our garages each morning, and back into them each evening, with nothing more than an occasional wave as we pass.

Not only were we connected with our neighbors when I was growing up, but we had an even stronger connection with our brethren.  It was not uncommon for someone to stop by on a Saturday, just because they happened to be near our neighborhood.  In fact, it was uncommon for that NOT to happen.  And we did the same.  Those people were closer than family.  Our home was their home, and vice versa.  We knew each other intimately, shared each others' joys, and helped each other through difficulties.  I've often wondered how my brethren here and now would react if I just showed up at their door one day because I happened to be in the neighborhood.  I don't really know what the response would be because people just don't do that sort of thing anymore.  And as a result, we don't know each other as well as brethren did in times' past.

Sadly, I don't think the "art of neighboring" exists on the scale it once did, and I think the reasons for that are many.  Perhaps the main reason is the very thing I'm doing right now - using the internet.  While blogging, Facebook, email, and texting can be a wonderful source for keeping in touch, many tend to use those media as their only source of communication.  When our girls were in Junior High, one of their friends lost her father, and I took the girls to the funeral.  During the eulogy, the only mention of this man's friendships was his "online friends."  The minister read from "posts" he had printed of these far away online friends' words of sympathy.   I remember being shocked by that, and wondering why he didn't touch the lives of those he saw daily - or if he did, why no mention was made of them.

So, what's the solution?  How do we get back to the place where we interact with people on a more personal level?  Log off.  Go outside.  Make an effort.  Learn about the lives of those you are around daily.  Be more of a "there you are" person, and less of a "here I am" one.  Visit someone, even if they seem shocked or uncomfortable at first - or, even better, invite someone into your home for a meal.  Take someone out to lunch.  Make a phone call instead of sending an email.  Hand write a note or letter to mail instead of messaging someone on Facebook.

In Acts 2:46, the early Christians "continued daily with one accord in the temple, and breaking bread from house to house . . ."  They saw the need for daily interaction on a personal level, and they grew as a result.  Peter tells us in 1 Peter 1:22 that we are to "love one another fervently with a pure heart."  We can't do that by waving from the inside of our cars, or seeing each other three times a week at a church building.

I'm logging off now, and don't be surprised to find me knocking on your door.  I'll bring some cookies.

"I am a part of all that I have met..." ~Alfred Lord Tennyson

It's December 1, and my November Thankfulness Project is complete.  To be honest, I could keep doing the entries for at least several more months - I didn't cover even half of my list, even with my "cheating" of grouping people together in one entry.  And interestingly enough, as I added an entry each day, it spurred memories of others, and my list continued to grow. This November project has been good for me.  It has brought to my remembrance many people who have at some point in my life made an impression - collectively, they have made me who I am.  I am so blessed through the people in my life, and I need to make sure they know that.

  However, I must be honest with you about my "list."  There are several names on that list that I decided not to write about, even if their name was randomly drawn.  Why?  Because the influence they had on me, and the lessons I learned from my experiences with those people were not positive, and I would never air that in a public forum.  Some of them were hard - very hard.  So, why am I thankful for them, and why are they even on the list?  Because we learn from every relationship we have in life - both the good and the bad.  In fact, I have probably learned from the bad, painful experiences I have had with people in life much more than I have from the good - or at least as much. Those "bad" experiences have made me more sensitive in a lot of ways to the needs of others, and for that I am thankful.

As I started this project, I quoted from "It's A Wonderful Life" in my October 31st entry.  One of the most memorable scenes in that movie is when Clarence tells George,“Strange, isn't it? Each man's life touches so many other lives. When he isn't around he leaves an awful hole, doesn't he?” Clarence was so right.  The quote I used in the title of this entry speaks to the same concept.  I AM a part of all that I have met, and that leads to a sobering thought - All I have ever met are a part of me.  Now that I am through looking outward at others, I need to take a long, hard look at myself.  Every day I come into contact with people in a multitude of ways - some live in my home, some I talk to on a regular basis, some I keep in contact with via email and Facebook, and others I simply encounter in random ways.  If they were to make a list like I have made, would they be willing to write publicly about me, or would I fall under that category of those who had an impact, but in a painful or difficult way?  That's something I need to consider.

I don't know for sure what direction I will go with this blog for now.  I enjoy writing, and will continue to add entries, but probably not on a daily basis.  I hope you will continue to stop by as you have opportunity.  I'll close for now with the following thoughts from the Apostle Paul, penned in Phil. 2:1-8:  "So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy,  complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind.  Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves.  Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.  Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death,even death on a cross."  When we live with a Christ-like mind, we will be that positive influence in the lives of others.  I plan to work harder at that, and I hope you will, too.